There Is a Grief that Can't Be Spoken

Dianne and I saw Les Misérables when it was on Broadway many years ago. I think it was my first show. It was moving and powerful. 

To be honest, I don't remember much about it except one song. It is called Empty Chairs at Empty Tables. All the revolutionaries are dead – except Marius. He is alone. As he reflects on his missing friends and loss, he then sings this emotional song about being the only man left:

There’s a grief that can’t be spoken,
There’s a pain goes on and on.
Empty chairs at empty tables,
now my friends are dead and gone.

When I heard it, the words, "There's a grief that can't be spoken," resonated on a deep in my heart. I knew what this meant and felt like long before I ever heard it in this song! 

And you know what? I think you do too. The song verbalizes the darkness, loss, pain, suffering, and inadequacy of being able to describe it, and even process it. . 

I think the first time I experienced this was when my dad died. I was nine. He was forty-eight. I had never felt loss like that before. I didn't know what it was except, my heart was broken, and my nine year old self didn't know how to fix a broken heart.  Any more than a fifteen year old, forty year old, or seventy year old does. 

In many ways, I carried this unspoken pain well into my adult life until a wise and gifted therapist helped me process my carried grief! And then the weight of the world was released. 

This expresses some of my motivation and desire to walk with people through grief! We don't know what is happening! We don't know how to process it! And we seldom find someone who can be present to us, hear our stories, acknowledge our emotions, and support as we create our path through the wilderness!